To Heaven and Back

Clouds like an expanding sea

A grand place just for me

Soothing light from all around

The peaceful place above the ground

Yellows and pinks color the clouds at my feet

There's a man dressed in a white sheet

Rainbows dance across his clothes

Silently he listens to all my woes

He rests a hand on my shoulder and says"Take Heart"

For he Knows the pain is about to start

So I look the Son of God in the face

Then fall into his sweet embrace

Darkness takes over the room 

It's all over I assume

Heavenly forms beckon'

It's all over I reckon'

A burst of light

I'm full of fright

It is then I awaken from my sleep

Though I never make a peep

About my journey to heaven

2013

2014

Resilience 

 

Out of the ashes a phoenix flies

Flaming wings oh so mighty kiss the skies

She told me not to worry about my past 

Because that old nightmare didn't last

She taught me how to change my day

I just close my eyes so I can pray

The flames of her wings create a spark

I no longer have to live in the dark

I'm rising from the ashes like my phoenix friend

the bad things like the good have to end

I follow her song like I follow my dreams

To that beautiful place bathed in the sun's beams

Like a Phoenix I will rise

Out of the ashes as my old life dies

Finally Me

 

Everyone said it was wrong

Even if it felt right

Everyone said to be strong

To resist and to fight

I decided to go my own way

Iknew I would be accepted someday

And now I am me 

Finally

I came out of my hiding place

Now all can see my true face

The weight is lifted I am free

I am who I am meant to be

The lies are gone without a trace

In being myself I found God's grace 

2016

Having a Brain Injury

 

Having a brain injury is strange

I woke up with a brain that is not mine

The doctors did all they could 

Everyone says it’s been so long you’re fine

I’m not reacting like I should

I have a life that I must rearrange 

Having a brain injury is wrong

My friends ask why I go to bed so early 

I just get so tired That I can’t operate

You can accept me as I am surely 

If you care about me why show such hate

Everyone says that I need to be strong

Having a brain injury is hard

It makes me uncomfortable when you ask me why I don’t drink

And when strangers ask me what’s wrong with my leg 

I constantly feel like I’m on the brink

Just let me live my life I beg 

I feel like I’m always on guard

Having a brain injury is powerful 

I’ve learned so much 

I’m more understanding 

I have deeper feelings and such

I’m much less demanding 

My world is more colorful 

What was once bad can change 

2019

2019

Standing Out

 

Out like a woodpecker on a flock of doves

Or like a wasp in a swarm of lady bugs

I stand out 

I stand out

All my life I’ve tried to blend in

No matter where I go or have been

Still I stand out 

I stand out

I’ve even tried to change

Tried to appear less strange 

Yet I stand out

I stand out 

But like a drop of red paint on white

Or the sun interrupting the night

I stand out 

I stand out

This is exhausting 

The energy it’s costing 

I stand out I stand out

I don’t want to stand out anymore 

I cry as I sink to the floor 

Why do I still stand out

Lonely 

 

I’m lonely 

The one and only 

They they everything is going to be okay

But they always forget to stay

I’m lonely 

Sinking slowly

I need someone 

But they always run

I’m lonely 

Almost lowly 

It’s hard to cope 

I’ve lost all hope 

I’m just lonely 

Treated coldly 

I’ve prayed for someone to stay with me

Eventually they always want to break free

I’m lonely

It’s not cozy

2019

2019

My scars make me beautiful 

 

 

My scars make me beautiful 

I believe that it’s true

I will not hide them

Or keep them unseen

Because then others will have no clue

My scars show I am strong

While others might say i am wrong

My scars make me beautiful 

I remember when I’m feeling blue

Some can’t see I’m a gem

They just don’t know where I’ve been

Healing takes pretty long

But I just moved along

My scars make me beautiful

My anxiety monster

 

My anxiety monster never leaves me alone

Not when I’m out

Not when I’m on my own

When I go for a walk he tells me I’ll fall

While I’m driving he says I’m gonna crash

He says my friends must hate me when they don’t answer the phone

“They hate you” he says with a shout

“they don’t like you at all”

“you’re like a rash”

This is all I have ever known

I don’t know if I can handle another bout

I’ve hit a wall 

Yet it’s started again when the sun first shone

2019

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